Teachers encounter a range of student behaviors. These behaviors can support teaching and learning or they can make it more challenging. It is common for anyone, teacher or not, to interpret behaviors like: being hostile, angry, acting out, depressed mood, or being withdrawn as personal A teacher with this mindset might blame themself for the behavior, thinking things like: “I’m a bad teacher. This student hates my class.” Or a teacher might blame the student seeing them as a “bad kid” or as a “student who just doesn’t care about learning.”
Trauma-informed teaching will help teachers understand that these types of behaviors are warning signs that a student might have experienced trauma or be experiencing trauma. As teachers learn more about what t might cause these behaviors, their mindsets begin to shift in a way that will help them engage with their students differently.
Across the globe, young people face extremely challenging situations. Some students grow up facing violence, abuse, or neglect at home; others struggle in the wake of natural disasters, war, famine, or poverty. When students experience something so upsetting or terrifying, it has a long term impact on them mentally and emotionally. And, when a student is feeling overwhelmed and unable to cope with those types of situations, we’d say they’re “in distress.” Extremely intense distress is called trauma. Both distress and trauma can affect how a student thinks and acts.
We probably have at least one of these students in our class right now. Their experiences drive the way they act, and making some small adjustments in our classroom can make a big difference for them. Today you’ll learn about how distress and trauma can affect behavior, signs to look out for, and what you can do to make your classroom more trauma-informed. Then you’ll be able to hear these strategies played out in sample conversations..
Shifting to a trauma-informed approach isn’t easy. It requires training to see students differently. Of course not all disruptive behavior in the classroom is due to distress or trauma, but instead of seeing this as something you need to manage and discourage, you’ll learn to see it as a sign a student might need some support.
Consider the story of Casey, a student who sometimes shouts out enough in class to pull everyone off topic. His behavior in class is the tip of his iceberg, without getting to know him better that’s all we would know. But Casey’s story, like so many of our students, is far more complex -- there is a lot under the surface. He acts out in class because things at home are really rough. He never knows if his father is going to be drunk or sober or when he there will be chaos or peace. His anxious and upset feelings come with him to school and contribute to the behavior he exhibits in class.
Casey would really benefit from a trauma-informed approach. Students who do not have the homelife difficulties that Casey has can benefit from this approach as well.
When we do these three things, we teach from a place of compassion rather than frustration, and our students feel safer and more engaged.
When a student exhibits one or more of the following warning signs, there is a chance that their behavior is related to some sort of distress or trauma.
General Warning Signs include things like:
Warning Signs and Student’s Age:
Warning Signs and Student’s Sex:
When you recognize any of these signs, reach out to the students exhibiting them to let them know you care and help them find more constructive ways to cope and succeed in your class.
If you notice that a student regularly seems:
in addition to approaching them with compassion, you should strongly consider referring them to a mental health professional in your school or community.
One (or more) of your current students is probably experiencing some sort of distress due to trauma. These incidents are commonly referred to as adverse childhood experiences or ACEs.
Students of all races and socio-economic statuses are impacted by trauma. However, if you are working in communities with higher rates of poverty, homelessness/housing insecurity or incarceration it’s likely that there are multiple students in your classroom who have experienced or are experiencing trauma.
A person’s brain is in learning mode when they feel safe. They can predict what will happen in their environment, and they have all their basic needs met. All of this really helps them control their emotions and focus on learning.
But when a person, especially a child, has any experience with an unsafe environment or intense danger, their brains are rewired to be on guard for more harm or neglect. The world isn’t a safe or nurturing place anymore; it can be a terrifying place.
When a child feels threatened or overwhelmed, or when something reminds them of a traumatic event, their brains go into reactive mode. Their heart might pound or their palms might get sweaty; they might feel a rush of adrenaline. Their body is getting ready to respond to something bad in one of three ways: fight, flee, or freeze.
Our brains have these instincts for a reason; they’re a good way to respond to real danger. But they aren’t so practical in our classrooms. When a student is fighting, fleeing, or freezing, they might not even realize what’s happening or why they’re acting in this way.
Listen to the following list of student behaviors, and think about each one that you might take personally.
It’s normal to naturally take these types of things personally. Imagine you have a student named Casey. Casey often has outbursts and expresses his hatred for your class. His behavior in class is the tip of his iceberg, without getting to know him better that’s all we would know. But Casey’s story, like so many of our students, is far more complex -- there is a lot under the surface. He acts out in class because things at home are really rough. He never knows if his father is going to be drunk or sober or when he there will be chaos or peace. His anxious and upset feelings come with him to school and contribute to the behavior he exhibits in class. So when he says he hates your class, what he’s really trying to say is “I’m in pain. Something is really bothering me.” Or even, “Hey, I don’t feel safe right now!”
The same way the tip of an iceberg suggests there is a lot more underneath the water, disruptive behavior in class can be a sign that the student is dealing with a lot and needs support. Recognizing a cry for help makes it easier not to take a student’s behavior personally. And it signals us to learn more about why this student isn’t in learning mode and to talk to the student and make them feel supported…
Be sure to follow your school’s protocol for mandatory reporting. Sometimes, a student will reveal an intention to harm themselves or the people around them, or that they’re living in an unhealthy or unsafe environment. We encourage you to follow your school’s protocol for mandatory reporting. You can and should also, talk to your school or community mental health support in more detail about the students you’re most concerned about. If you’re unaware of what to do, it’s helpful to familiarize yourself with your area’s policy of mandatory reporting.
When a student suffers a loss, or even a whole community experiences a critical incident, we know that many students might be in distress. But what if some of them are not showing any warning signs?
Consider a student like Ray. Ray lost her dad during a hurricane. Overall, Ray seemed fine and her grades stayed high. So no warning signs, but her teacher expressed her condolences and checked-in a few times during the term anyway. Later, Ray said that this approach had helped keep her afloat. Reaching out to students, like Ray, puts you on their resilience-building team. This is important because these students can be at-risk for anxiety and depression and for a variety of risky behaviors.
Doing a whole class activity like a breathing exercise can help all of your students learn some ways that they can notice and better manage their feelings. Here is an example:
Teachers that use exercises like this one regularly see improvements in their students’ self-esteem, confidence, resilience and achievement.
Checking-in with a student, building trust, encouraging them to share, problem solving an instructional modification and making a referral, if needed, is a lot to ask on top of everything you are already doing. But making these efforts will mean a lot for all of your students and they will hopefully increase the chances that you can keep everyone, even yourself, in learning mode.
Mr. Bauer is a middle school ELA teacher who has some concerns about his student Charlie. Here’s a list of the things that he’s noticed:
In terms of academic performance: Charlie is a hard working student, who clearly loves books. She keeps up with the assigned reading. Her class participation grade dropped recently.
In terms of social/emotional cues: Sometimes when called on Charlie has no idea what the class has been discussing. Working with other students goes well sometimes. Other times, she doesn’t want to talk at all. Charlie cried when asked about a recent drop in her participation grade and pleaded to be able to stay in the honors class next year.
You'll listen to two examples of the conversation Mr. Bauer has with Charlie as he sits down with her during a free period.
Mr. Bauer’s first goal is to check in with Charlie. Mr. Bauer can build trust and encourage her to share by giving her specific praise, asking open-ended questions, and expressing empathy. Mr. Bauer’s second goal is to brainstorm one way you can make the class more comfortable for Charlie.
Mr. Bauer: Thanks for stopping by, Charlie.
Charlie: (nods) Am I in trouble?
Mr. Bauer: No, you’re not in trouble. I just wanted to check in with you. You've been acting strangely in class
Charlie: Acting strangely?
Mr. Bauer: Yeah, I don't know… just not like yourself. Can you tell me what that's about?
Charlie: I don't know.
Feedback: "Acting strangely" is subjective, so it wasn't clear to Charlie what Mr. Bauer meant. It's also a negative label, which could make her feel judged.
Mr. Bauer: Your grades have been slipping recently and you've been participating less. I'm kind of concerned, Charlie.
Charlie: Am I not doing good enough? I'm trying really hard.
Mr. Bauer: I know you are. It's just- this is a challenging class.
Charlie: (nods)
Feedback: This wasn't the best choice. Mr. Bauer is trying to encourage Charlie to open up so he can learn how to help her. Instead of making her worried about her academics, he should try putting her at ease with specific praise, a nonjudgmental observation, or an open-ended question.
Mr. Bauer: This is an honors class, so there are different expectations about discussion participation than in other classes.
Charlie: I know. I'm really sorry.
Mr. Bauer: You've gotta be able to keep up.
Charlie: (nods, sighs)
Feedback: Taking a punitive tone in this moment isn't the best choice to help Charlie. She needs someone to listen to how she is feeling, and help her problem solve on her level.
Mr. Bauer: Sometimes students realize that honors is a bit too challenging. It might be less difficult for you in a different English class.
Charlie: No, I want to stay in honors. Please… I can do better.
Mr. Bauer: All right. I can see the class is important to you. So let's figure something out.
Charlie: (nods)
Charlie Thought: I know I can do it…why doesn’t he believe me?
Feedback: Even if this wasn't his intention, Charlie felt threatened by the suggestion that she shouldn't be in honors English. In moments like this, students need to feel supported in order to try harder.
Mr. Bauer: How much has paying attention been a challenge in your other classes?
Charlie: It depends. Sometimes it's fine. Other times, I kinda… space out.
Mr. Bauer: Why do you think that is?
Charlie: I don't know… sometimes there are things that I don't feel like talking about. Like the book we're reading now.
Feedback: It's a good idea for Mr. Baure to look for patterns in Charlie's behavior, and ask her what she has noticed in a non-threatening way. That can help they work together on how to address it.
Mr. Bauer: Books can bring up some strong feelings. How does reading this book make you feel?
Charlie: Uh… upset. It made me upset.
Mr. Bauer: Why did this book make you upset?
Charlie: Yeah. I… I really didn't like it when the dog got hurt.
Charlie Thought: My stomach feels weird…
Feedback: This was good. Mr. Bauer validated Charlie's reaction to the book and asked an open-ended question about her feelings. That made her feel safe enough to share a little about what's bothering her.
Mr. Bauer: I remember how upset I was the first time I read that part. I had a dog when I was a kid, and I've always been a dog person.
Charlie: Me too.
Mr. Bauer: So I can definitely understand-
Charlie: Wait, what kind of dog was it?
Mr. Bauer: My dog? She was a beagle.
Charlie: Aww, I love beagles… I had a dog growing up too.
Feedback: Mr. Bauer did well at finding a way to connect with Charlie, it really encouraged her to open up!
Mr. Bauer: What was your dog's name?
Charlie: Her name was Ash.
Mr. Bauer: "Ash". That's a great name. What breed was she?
Charlie: She was a husky.
Mr. Bauer: Oh, cool, huskies have such pretty eyes.
Charlie: Yeah. They really do.
Mr. Bauer: Sorry, we're getting off track.
Charlie: It's okay. It's cool you like dogs.
Mr. Bauer: Anyway, let's get back to talking about the dog in the book and the story overall.
Charlie: (disappointed) Sure.
Mr. Bauer: Charlie, it's good when we read books that make us uncomfortable. Don't you want to push yourself to learn and grow?
Charlie: I guess…
Mr. Bauer: When you say the book is too hard for you, I see it as a chance to challenge yourself, let you confront something scary in a safe way.
Charlie: That’s not what I’m trying to say…It just…
Mr. Bauer: What?
Charlie: I can read the book…. I understand it…. It’s just hard for me to talk about the dog.
Feedback: Just because many students can work through feeling uncomfortable about a book doesn't mean every student can. Charlie might need mental health support to confront the intense fear this book calls up for her.
Mr. Bauer: If the dog in the book is the problem for you, just don't talk about that part. There's so much more going on in that book. And you should be fine when we move on in a week or so.
Charlie: Sure.
Mr. Bauer: … you don't sound convinced.
Charlie: I just… I don't know.
Mr. Bauer: All right, Charlie, everything is going to be fine. You can try harder and pay more attention moving forward. Sound good?
Charlie: Yup.
Mr. Bauer: I know you want to do as well as you can, so you're going to really try. Right?
Charlie: Right.
Mr. Bauer: Maybe we can chat again in a week, and see how you’re feeling.
Charlie: Okay. Thanks.
Mr. Bauer: Sure thing.
One Week Later
Mr. Bauer: Hi Charlie, I figured it was time we had another chat.
Charlie: Sure.
Mr. Bauer: I haven't seen quite as much of an improvement in your participation as I would have hoped. I'd like to talk a little more about that, if that's okay.
Charlie: Okay.
Mr. Bauer: I think we need to talk about how you can focus better in class.
Charlie: Oh. Okay.
Charlie Thought: Why is Mr. Bauer being so bossy?
Mr. Bauer: I focus better when I make eye contact with people. You should try that.
Charlie: Oh yeah?
Mr. Bauer: Yeah, I'm less in my own head. Somehow I hear people better.
Charlie: Okay.
Charlie Thought: I don't think I want to do that.
Feedback: Mr. Bauer telling Charlie what she needs isn't the best way to find the most helpful solution for her. Asking students for their ideas can put you on the right track, and framing your ideas as questions ("How would you feel about…?") can make students more receptive to them.
Mr. Bauer: You should try taking notes when you read. Then you can have them on hand when we discuss.
Charlie I do that.
Mr. Bauer: But do you think about the class discussion while you're taking them? I think if you keep the discussion in mind, you might find it easier to know what to say in class.
Charlie: (shrugs) I guess I could try that.
Mr. Bauer: Good. Let's see how that works for you.
Mr. Bauer: Other than ways to make class feel better for you, I've been thinking about our conversation the other day.
Charlie: Yeah?
Mr. Bauer: I asked around, and you've been having a problem with paying attention in other classes.
Charlie: … does that mean I'm in trouble?
Mr. Bauer: No, but it has been happening a lot. So that makes me think we should do something about it.
Charlie: What do you mean?
Charlie Thought: I don't think I want to do that.
Feedback: Talking with colleagues is often part of supporting students; but Mr. Brauer made it sound like a lot of teachers consider her a problem, which made Charlie upset.
Mr. Bauer: When teachers notice a student having similar challenges in a few classes, sometimes we want to help the student check in with one of our counselors.
Charlie: A counselor?
Mr. Bauer: Yeah, someone whose job it is to talk to students about anything that's bothering them.
Charlie: Oh. Gotcha.
Mr. Bauer: I think you should talk to Ms. Ines, the school counselor.
Charlie: No, that's okay.
Mr. Bauer: It would be really good for you.
Charlie: (shakes head no)
Feedback: Pushing an idea on Charlie made her push back. Instead, you could try framing it as a question ("How would you feel if…?"). That makes it less threatening and gives students room to speak up if they have reservations.
Mr. Bauer: If you don't talk to someone about what you're dealing with, things will get worse.
Charlie: (shakes head no)
Mr. Bauer: Charlie, you have to deal with this now. It's already a problem in my class, and you're only in middle school.
Charlie: (shakes head no) No…
Feedback: Seeing a counselor can be really intimidating for students, so scare tactics like "things will get worse" don't help. Instead, find ways to help them explore and address that fear.
Mr. Bauer: A lot of students like talking to her.
Charlie: Really?
Mr. Bauer: Yeah. And, you don't have to tell her anything you don't want to.
Mr. Bauer: I've known her for a little while, and she's a really good listener.
Charlie: That doesn't sound so bad. Maybe… why do you think I should go?
Mr. Bauer: I know you want to stay in honors English, and this will help you feel more comfortable.
Charlie: I really do. Thanks.
Mr. Bauer: So how about it? Want to give it a try?
Charlie: I… I'll think about it.
Mr. Bauer: Let's go over everything we talked about, if that's okay with you.
Charlie: (nods)
Mr. Bauer: You're going to try taking notes before we discuss, you'll try making more eye contact during discussions, and we'll check back in about Ms. Ines another time. How does all that sound to you?
Charlie: Sure.
Mr. Bauer: Thanks for coming in, Charlie. Ms. Ines will probably be in touch with you soon.
Overall Mr. Bauer struggled to support Charlie in this conversation. These types of interactions are not easy, and can be new for many teachers.
At times, he put Charlie at ease and gained her trust by asking open-ended questions, which gave Charlie the opportunity to share insights about her behavior.
However, Mr. Bauer missed a few opportunities to work with Charlie to figure out ways to help her stay engaged and participate in class. Giving advice rather than collaboratively problem solving made Charlie uncomfortable. Additionally, Mr. Bauer could have used more praise and specific descriptions to help Charlie feel safe discussing her behavior in class and solutions.
In the end, Charlie didn’t feel safe enough to accept Mr. Bauer’s suggestion of seeing the counselor.
Now let’s listen to an interaction where Mr. Bauer takes a more understanding approach and meets the goals of the conversation.
Mr. Bauer: Thanks for stopping by, Charlie.
Charlie: (nods) Am I in trouble?
Mr. Bauer: No, you’re not in trouble. I just wanted to check in with you.
Charlie: Okay.
Mr. Bauer: I saw you finished another book, you're off our reading chart again this week.I'm glad to have such an avid reader in class.
Charlie: (laughs) Yeah, I, like… really like books.
Mr. Bauer: What do you like about books?
Charlie: I don't know… you get to be in other worlds, with different people.Sometimes they're like you, and sometimes they're not, so you get to see things in a new way.
Mr. Bauer: That's why I like reading too.
Charlie: (Smiles)
Feedback: Mr. Bauer gave Charlie specific praise, which made her feel seen and appreciated, as well as proud of her strengths. As a result, she opened up to him.
Mr. Bauer: I've seen you looking off into the distance a couple of times during class discussions.I wanted to check in about that.
Charlie: Yeah, you told me that last week. I'm really sorry, I don't know why it keeps happening.
Mr. Bauer: You don't need to be sorry, it's just… you used to talk a couple times every discussion, and always had interesting things to say.
Charlie: Thanks. My mind kind of wanders sometimes… I'll try to do better.
Feedback: This is a great way to start the conversation. Mr. Brauer observation was specific and factual, so Charlie knows exactly what he meant, and it felt sincere. It was also nonjudgmental, which helps reassure her.
Mr. Bauer: What kinds of things do you usually think about during class discussions?
Charlie: I don't know. The book, I guess.
Mr. Bauer: What about the book?
Charlie: It's just a lot to think about… It's not my favorite.
Feedback: Mr. Brauer did a good job asking an open-ended question, which prompted Charlie to share her feelings about the book. Sometimes it can take a while to build trust, encourage sharing, and get a better picture of what's bothering a student.
Mr. Bauer: Are you less interested than you used to be in the reading?
Charlie: No. I'm still interested.
Mr. Bauer: Well, what is it then?
Charlie: …I don't know.
Feedback: Mr.Brauer tried to guess what the problem is with a leading question ("Are you less interested…?"), but guessed wrong. It's usually faster to ask a broader question ("Why do you think…?") or to make an observation ("Yesterday, I saw…") and let the student share what's going on.
Mr. Bauer: Sometimes I have a hard time focusing when there's a lot on my mind.
Charlie: Yeah. I just don't really like the book we're reading.
Feedback: Sharing that Charlie's behavior is normal for anyone, even adults, is a great way to get on her level show that Mr. Brauer wasn’t judging her. As he keeps building trust with Charlie, she might start to say a little more about what's bothering her.
Mr. Bauer: Books can bring up some strong feelings. How does reading this book make you feel?
Charlie: Uh… upset. It made me upset.
Mr. Bauer: Why did this book make you upset?
Charlie: Yeah. I… I really didn't like it when the dog got hurt.
Charlie Thought: I trust Mr. Bauer… but I'm kinda nervous to talk more about this right now…
Feedback: Mr. Brauer validated Charlie's reaction to the book and asked an open-ended question about her feelings. That made her feel safe enough to share a little about what's bothering her.
Mr. Bauer: I get how hard it can be to read books you don't like. Sometimes it's difficult to want to keep going with it.
Charlie: Sorta. I want to keep going with it-
Mr. Bauer: But you just are having trouble with the story.
Charlie: I guess. I like dogs… I had a dog growing up.
Mr. Bauer: That's cool. I like dogs too.
Charlie: (half-smiles)
Mr. Bauer: Dog people usually find this book to be kind of challenging to read, when I've taught it before.
Charlie: Not challenging, exactly… scary.
Mr. Bauer: So reading that part of the book made you feel scared.
Feedback: Mr. Brauer did a good job at trying to understand Charlie's reaction and helping her realize it's normal to feel that way sometimes. That encouraged her to open up about Ash.
Charlie: I- I didn't like it. It made me think about my dog Ash. There were a couple times, when I was little… when Ash got hurt.
Mr. Bauer: Oh no, I'm so sorry to hear that.
Charlie: (nods)
Mr. Bauer: How did she get hurt?
Charlie: Um… she was barking… something really upset her.
Mr. Bauer: Mhm.
Charlie: And- and that made my dad angry.
Mr. Bauer: How did that make you feel?
Charlie: …scared.
Feedback: Mr. Brauer got additional info from Charlie. Now, he probably know enough to problem solve an instructional modification. There is no need to dig deeper.
Mr. Bauer: Just so you know, it's completely normal for you to have trouble focusing when you're thinking about something intense.
Charlie: Oh… really?
Mr. Bauer: Yeah. Sometimes, when people start thinking about bad things happening, it's
hard to think about anything else.
Charlie: Yeah… that's true.
Feedback: Sometimes when a student has a strong feeling or reaction, they feel scared of it or ashamed of it. Knowing it's normal can help them work past those feelings, be more aware of their behavior, and maybe even change it.
Mr. Bauer: Can I share a bit about what's helped other students who have trouble talking in class?
Charlie: Yeah, sure.
Mr. Bauer: Well, in the past, when a student has found it difficult to talk in class, I let them write in their reading log.
Charlie: Hm. That would be way easier for me.
Mr. Bauer: Then I can read your entries and leave you comments. How does that sound?
Charlie: Good.
Mr. Bauer: Maybe we can chat again in a week, and see how you're feeling.
Charlie: Okay. Thanks.
Mr. Bauer: Sure thing.
Feedback: Sometimes students reveal an intention to harm themselves or the people around them, or that their living environment is unhealthy or unsafe. When this happens, we suggest you talk to school or community mental health supports about students who concern you, and be aware of your area's policy of mandatory reporting.
Because Charlie did not share info that requires referral, so let's jump forward a week to when Mr. Bauer checks in with her. Mr. Brauer’s first goal is to see how the class has been for her. His second goal is to problem solve about class improvements. The third goal is to refer her to mental health focused support, if needed.
One Week Later
Mr. Bauer: Hi Charlie, I'm glad it worked out for us to talk again.
Charlie: Me too. I… like talking with you.
Mr. Bauer: I like what you wrote in your journal yesterday about the dog symbolizing the boy's childhood.
Charlie: Thanks. I liked what you said about characters representing parts of other characters.
Mr. Bauer: So how has the last week felt for you?
Feedback: When Mr. Brauer asked open-ended questions like, "How has the last week felt?" he gave her room to share and her answers can give him important information about what she is thinking or how she is feeling.
Charlie: Pretty good. The reading log makes it a lot easier for me to get my thoughts out.
Mr. Bauer: That makes sense.
Charlie: I wish I could write instead of talking in all my classes.
Mr. Bauer: For now, let's focus on this class. If you just wrote in your journal, we'd miss out on your interesting insights. So let's keep using the reading log and see if you can share some of those thoughts in class as well.
Charlie: Okay. Thanks.
Charlie Thought: I was really liking just writing… but I guess I can try to talk more.
Mr. Bauer: I'd like to talk a little bit about how else we can make this class work well for you. I really want you to feel comfortable sharing your thoughts with the class.
Charlie: Yeah, me too.
Mr. Bauer: Would it be okay if we brainstorm a little about that?
Charlie: Sure.
Feedback: Mr. Brauer did a good job at setting a tone of collaboration. And with a student who might have experienced trauma, asking if you can talk about something first can help put them at ease, they can have a hard time with surprises or transitions.
Mr. Bauer: What might help you focus on the class, participate more?
Charlie: I don't know… I don't like talking in front of everyone.
Mr. Bauer: Well, what would make it easier to share some of your ideas with someone else?
Charlie: Maybe, talking one-on-one. If it's with you, or a friend.
Feedback: It's a great idea to ask students for solutions--sometimes they suggest things you wouldn't have thought of, and either way it shows you value them and their ideas.
Mr. Bauer: How would you feel if we did the next discussion in partners? I'm going to make the assignment, and you can tell me who you'd like to work with.
Charlie: I could just discuss with Stephanie instead of the whole class?
Mr. Bauer: Yeah, exactly. I usually walk around and check in with the pairs to hear what they've talked about.
Charlie: I… think that would help.
Feedback: Framing an idea as a question ("How would you feel if…?") makes it less threatening and gives students room to speak up if they have reservations.
Mr. Bauer: Sometimes when people feel nervous it can help them to do a breathing exercise and help their body to relax. When someone's body is relaxed, their mind is usually relaxed too. What do you think about that?
Charlie: I don't know… won't that be weird?
Mr. Bauer: I'll teach it to the whole class. When everyone is doing it, I don't think it'll be that weird.
Charlie: It sounds kinda corny… but okay.
Feedback: Whole-class activities can help everyone--and they can also show a student they aren't alone in needing some support.
Mr. Bauer: Other than ways to make class feel better for you, I've been thinking about our conversation the other day.
Charlie: Yeah?
Mr. Bauer: What you said about Ash sounded pretty scary.
Charlie: …yeah. I don't really like talking about it.
Feedback: Mr. Brauer acknowledged Charlie’s feelings as valid, which was a great way to build rapport and trust.
Mr. Bauer: What was it like living with your dad?
Charlie: …
Feedback: It's clear that this is a very difficult topic for Charlie. Her discomfort is a strong indication that she could benefit from talking to Ms. Ines.
Mr. Bauer: What you said about your dad, and Ash… where does your dad live? Does he still live at your house?
Charlie: No. I don't know where he is.
Mr. Bauer: When did that happen?
Charlie: …
Mr. Bauer: How would you feel about talking to Ms. Ines, the school counselor about your challenges focusing in class?
Charlie: …does that mean there's something wrong with me?
Mr. Bauer: No, lots of students get worried, or have thoughts in school that make it difficult to learn. Our counselors are really good at listening to what's on a student's mind.
Charlie: Huh. I didn't know that. I'm not so sure though…
Feedback: Framing an idea as a question ("How you feel about…?") makes a referral seem less threatening. Also, by sharing that other students find it helpful to speak with a counselor, it helps to normalize the experience and reduce potential stigma surrounding counseling.
Mr. Bauer: It sounds like you could use someone else to talk to, someone who might be able to help both of us.
Charlie: But, I like talking with you.
Mr. Bauer: And I'm happy to keep sitting down together. At the same time, Ms. Ines is even better than I am with helping people.
Charlie: …
Mr. Bauer: How would you feel if I introduced you, and the three of us talked a little together?
Charlie: I don't know.
Mr. Bauer: You don't have to tell her anything you don't want to. I've known her for a little while, and she's a really good listener. When I'm stressed, she's the person that I like to talk to!
Charlie: That doesn't sound so bad. Maybe… why do you think I should go?
Mr. Bauer: I am going to do everything I can to help you. But at the same time,I want you to be able to feel comfortable outside my classroom as well.I think talking to someone like Ms. Ines could really help you with that.
Charlie: …
Mr. Bauer: Sometimes it helps to talk openly about our feelings with someone we trust.
Charlie: Okay. I'll go.
Mr. Bauer: Let's go over everything we talked about, if that's okay with you.
Charlie: …
Mr. Bauer: You're going to keep writing in your reading log when we have full class discussions, and also try to participate more in class. We'll try discussing in partners instead of a full class discussion once to see how that feels… I'll try teaching the class a breathing exercise tomorrow… And we'll set up a time for both of us to sit down with Ms. Ines and get to know one another. How does all that sound to you?
Charlie: That sounds good. Thanks Mr. Bauer.
Mr. Bauer: Let's try giving Ms. Ines a call and see if she's around…
Let’s see why that conversation was much more successful.
Overall, Mr. Bauer did a great job supporting Charlie in this conversation.
Mr. Bauer consistently make Charlie feel comfortable and was able to gain her trust.
By working with Charlie to figure out ways to help her stay engaged and participate, Charlie felt more capable of change and that Mr. Bauer was there for her.
Mr. Bauer used open-ended questions, praise and specific descriptions to help Charlie feel safe discussing her behavior in class. By showing empathy, Charlie felt more confident in her ability to succeed. Together they came with some instructional modifications that were a great match for Charlie.
Additionally, Charlie agreed to see Ms. Ines because you made her feel safe during the conversation., Mr. Bauer did a good job of suggesting the referral in a non-threatening way.
Sometimes, a student like Charlie will reveal an intention to harm themselves or the people around them, or that they’re living in an unhealthy or unsafe environment. We encourage you to talk to your school or community mental health support in more detail about the students you’re most concerned about, and to familiarize yourself with your area’s policy of mandatory reporting.
Doing a whole class activity helps students learn some ways that they can notice and better manage their feelings. A lot of teachers who do this activity at the beginning of each class. Schools that use exercises like this one see improvements in self-esteem, confidence, resilience and achievement. Sharing trauma-informed exercises with the whole class helps us ensure that harder to spot students also receive some support. Anything you can do to make their school environment more predictable or foster their sense of self-worth really helps. In some cases whole school communities move together towards a trauma-informed approach. You can explore more about whole school approaches and activities like these in your Resources section.
We’re not gurus, therapists, or superheroes… we’re teachers. It’s pretty amazing when we can recognize warning signs and connect with a struggling student. It’s a big deal when a student who has always seen themselves as a “problem kid” starts to talk about what’s hard for them. Or for a withdrawn student to feel more connected to their class and their teacher. Finding just the right solution to help a student feel safer in class can be a trial-and-error process -- it’s a journey.
This concludes the simulation. Please click the link below to request a certificate of completion.